Do you need to make some tough decisions about your future?

Decision-making is a constant part of our daily lives. From choosing what to eat to determining where to focus our attention, the options can be overwhelming. To avoid becoming bogged down in indecision, many of us rely on habit, procrastination, or impulsive choices. However, the true consequences of these decisions may not be evident until the future.

As Lewis Carroll once said, “if you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there.” To avoid ending up somewhere unexpected, it’s important to have a clear understanding of our goals and the steps required to achieve them. While creating a plan can help guide our decisions, we must also be prepared to adapt as circumstances change. This means being open to unexpected developments and evaluating their implications for our future plans.

It’s easy to get caught up in the moment and drift through life without a clear sense of purpose. However, this can lead to a sense of dissatisfaction and a lack of fulfillment. To live a truly fulfilled life, we must take the time to understand ourselves and what we truly care about. This will enable us to make tough decisions with confidence and clarity.

Have you ever made a life-changing decision? How did you approach the decision-making process, and what were the results? Sharing your experiences can help others navigate the challenging process of decision-making.

What is the essence of love?

I have heard the phrase “I love working here” many times over the last few weeks which is wonderful and very uplifting. It got me thinking about the love in a number of contexts and the language that underpins this. Love exists between two people, between a group of people, with an activity or with an object. For each of these there seem to be four common aspects which are fascinating.

Firstly there is an emotional connection that allows the experience to be memorable. These experiences are often shared in stories.

Secondly there is a shared value that is at the core of the love. For an organisation that might be the purpose or the societal outcomes that are created.

The third aspect is for everyone involved it feels obvious and can be difficult to explain. The experience is one where time flies by and you can enter a state of flow.

The final aspect is that you can leave all your other worries or concerns and lose yourself in the experience. The mutual trust and support allows you to be your best and reach a level of performance that you did not think was possible.

So love is where you Loose yourself in Obvious activities that you Value and create Experiences that you want to tell everyone about. That seems to be the essence of love. What are your thoughts? Does this resonate?

Do your current sacrifices justify your expected future happiness?

Jam tomorrow is a phrase that refers to the promise that never gets fulfilled, yet we all hope that it will. We all have dreams or ambitions that drive us and motivate our actions. We inevitably make some compromises or sacrifices so that we can achieve a future goal. A simple example is to save some of your earnings in a bank account for a future purchase or that unexpected rainy day. We may choose to focus on training so that we might win a medal or a competition. Athletes will often give up their social lives to focus on achieving peak performance for that future prize.

No doubt being driven by something that you know deep down matters to you make life very worthwhile. Until the point at which you have either succeeded or failed in your ambition. At this point you will know if your sacrifice was justfied. The challenge you face is how to avoid falling into the deep well of regret, either because you did not acheive your ambition or it did not bring you the expected happiness.

It is always better to have tried and failed than not tried at all. As a minimum you will learn from the exprience and have some fun stories to share with others. If you succeed, your self esteem and pride will increase. You will have an opportunity to progress further. Having reflected on this over the last few weeks during my travels, I have concluded that it is best to push yourself a little. Try to improve yourself in some way and use this as a source of self motiviation. Set small goals to get started with something. Start that class you always wanted to do or explore a question that you have ignored.

What are your thoughts on making scarifices for future happiness? Do you have any experiences to share?

Do you need to be as cool as a cucumber to achieve the best results?

I suspect you have heard the phrase cool as a cucumber many times before. Did you know the origin dates back to the 1700s? The phrase refers to the ability to stay calm in extreme situations such as fear, pressure, conflict, war, happiness, excitement or euphoria. As I think about successful people they are able to stay calm and think clearly. In contrast those that get flustered or erratic have tended to be less successful.

Over the last year working with the new presenters on Rangoli Radio has provided many interesting experiences. The anxiety or fear of a presenter experiences increases rapidly before any live broadcast. It is most pronounced amongst new presenters. A sense of satisfaction of accomplishment after a successful show is difficult to describe but is very evident in their face. We trained a small group of 16-19 year old students in broadcasting skills. I am sure this will be a memory that will stay with them for years. More importantly is that this experience will increase their confidence in the future. I suspect the training made them a little more “cool as a cucumber”.

Staying calm allows peak performance to come through. All the practice and learning is ready to be put to good use. Anxiety and fear hold you back. You need to develop techniques that can calm you down. For me taking a few slow deep breaths works very well. I have seen others shut their eyes for a few minutes, stroke/rub a lucky charm or slowly count backwards from 10. Finding a technique that works for you and helps you become “cool as a cucumber” when you feel under pressure will help you be the best.
How do you stay calm under extreme pressure? What experiences or advice can you share?

If you want to write a Sunday Sprinkle, have an idea for a Sunday Sprinkle or want to collaborate on a future Sunday Sprinkle don’t hesitate to connect with me.

Where is your true freedom?

Our day is filled with activities that need to be completed to achieve outcomes. The activities are linked to our responsibilities or ambitions. However, how often do you feel free? That sense of relief can allow you to de-stress and refresh. We all crave that true freedom and have to develop routines that can be maintained with all our commitments.

Going on a regular holiday is a common way and the pandemic has made this difficult. Many are looking forward to a special holiday this year. The planning and preparation can also help provide relief. Making a major change in your house or commitments is another way. These two actions may be difficult to achieve so we do need to find smaller and simpler ways to feel the freedom you need.

Having a hobby or habit that provides you with a daily dose of freedom is good practice that we should all find. Daily meditation or mindfulness is one option. Going for a walk with nature is also excellent. Painting, writing, reading or other artistic pursuits provide relief. Physical exercise routines are another excellent option. Just 15 minutes of feeling true freedom a day can give you the energy and conviction you need to excel in your day.

Do you feel you have sufficient freedom in your life? What changes could you make? Please do share your stories of how you created more freedom or how that sense of freedom had helped you.

Gathered or given – what should you use to measure the value of your life?

Sadly we only really understand the value of a life when it is taken away. The majority of people prioritise gathering a wide range of possessions. As a child, our mind is like a sponge absorbing knowledge to prepare to play our part in society and create the wealth needed to live. Being able to gather enough funds to purchase sufficient food, have shelter, clothes and other essentials leads us towards gainful employment. Once we reach a level of contentment that gathering does not provide the inner peace we crave, we turn to new paths. Looking inward draws us towards meditation, mindfulness, or spirituality. The lucky ones have access to techniques for inner exploration at an early age. However, they may not have the maturity to appreciate what we have.

As life progresses, the desire to give back grows stronger as we seek ways of helping those less fortunate than ourselves. Donations are an obvious option. However, this does not provide satisfaction and we look for alternative paths. I have seen people focus on building new facilities that serve communities. Creating schools, temples, community halls, food banks and support groups provide an excellent platform. Talking to those approaching the natural end of their lives they enjoy sharing precious moments they cherish. Hiding in each moment is a pearl of wisdom they hope others will also experience.

Once life ends, the possessions that have been gathered are shared with family, friends or charities. The memory of most of their possessions that were gathered rapidly fades. What stays is what was given. Giving their expertise or possessions to help others keeps the memory of their lives for many years. The more I think about this, the precious opportunity for giving should not be missed. This is where the gift of life is used to be a gift to others.

How do you think we should measure the value of life – through what is gathered or given? How has this changed through the years for you?

Are you ready to make that life changing decision?

The number of social media posts announcing changes in career and retirement has increased over the past few weeks. Many of my mentoring discussions have also been about making life-changing decisions. Balancing the fear of the unknown with the euphoria of the opportunity may sound simple however requires careful consideration. Where did you start?

The first step is to understand your current responsibilities and the positive aspects of your current situation. Just writing this as a list is helpful but not enough. Your ambitions, motivations and expectations from the changes need to be clear. This must include the financial goals, relationship changes and lifestyle elements. This list quickly becomes too complex and unwieldy to be useful. So you need to discuss your thoughts with a few people you trust before developing a decision matrix. The decision matrix needs to document the things you want to preserve and a prioritised set of things you want to change. Use this matrix to both brainstorm options and assess opportunities. We are all on a never-ending voyage of self-discovery. Use every opportunity to make progress in this journey.

Creating a decision matrix helps you select a path forward that feels right. It keeps you motivated and will provide a constant reminder of why you chose this path. When things don’t go quite as planned you can use the decision matrix to renew your motivation and reinstil the confidence you need to make progress. The pandemic has got everyone rethinking their current lifestyle and what they want for the future. The opportunities are abundant and this is a good time to make significant changes that can give you the sense of fulfilment and contentment that makes life worthwhile.

Have you or are you making life-changing decisions? What advice would you give others? Can you share experiences of making a life-changing decision in the past?

What is your most precious gift?

Returning to the routine of work after the Christmas and New Year vacations got me thinking about why I do what I do. Have you thought about this? As I considered all that mattered and started to think about how you can help others by bringing a little happiness for some time. This reminded the most precious gift that we all have in our life.

We all need to be grateful for the life we have. Regardless of your current predicament, you can choose your actions. The gift of life can be taken away in an instant. So we all need to live every day to the fullest. Ask yourself if you have done everything you can today. Why are you leaving things till tomorrow that can be done today? Focus on the things that are important to you at this moment. You are responsible for your actions and the consequences. Choose your actions wisely with the appreciation of this precious gift of life you have been given.

Start by reminding yourself this is your life and identifying what you appreciate. Also, think about what had been holding you back? What are you putting off? You will not know what you are really capable of doing unless you try. So pick one thing you have thought about doing and been putting off. That fear of the unknown or the worry of making a fool of yourself might be holding you back. The fact that this idea has come into your mind means deep down life is pushing towards doing this. So be bold and take the first little step.

Why are you grateful for your precious gift of life? What action are you going to take that you have been holding off? Please do share your thoughts here to motivate others to take the first step.

What 3 simple words to help you prepare for 2022?

As we start a new year, it is a good time to reflect on the previous year and decide what you will aim to achieve this year. Having a target to aim for helps us decide where to focus your attention and also select the activities you will allow into your life. Three simple words provide an effective framework for your reflection: could, should and would.

What could I do?

Start by considering what you could have done last year. Use this phase to help you understand a little more about what matters to you and why you do things. Then think about what you could do in the coming year. Let your mind wander here and dream of all the possibilities. Think about how you would feel if this dream came true. Also the possibilities that this might provide in the future. Being specific about your ambition provides the self motivation we need to get started.

What should I do in the future?

The second step is to remind yourself what you are responsible for and so should or must do. Your physical health had to be a high priority as is your mental health. Think through the weekly routine that you should adopt. Also think through the roles you perform: parent, sibling, child, friend, employee, leader, confidant, therapist, agony aunt, chef, housekeeper, banker, gardener, artist etc. The list of roles is almost endless and this is your opportunity to be comprehensive in thinking through your responsibilities and create a checklist that you can use to remind you of the things that you might have neglected.

What would I really commit to?

The final stage is to select the goals or activities from your could and should lists. Develop the SMART (specific, measurable, attainable, relevant and time bound) goals and make a commitment to yourself that this is where you really want to focus. Go through all the roles that you should perform and ensure there are relevant goals. In your excitement of dreaming of a better future we often forget that there are some constraints that you do need to think through. Firstly there are only 24 hours in a day and you need time to eat, sleep etc. I have found it useful to build a weekly or monthly time budget for each of your goals. This is a useful guide to assess the viability of your goals and help you prioritise.

Using the could, should and would framework has helped me in developing my annual plan whilst helping me stay focused. I hope you find this useful and I would be very interested to know more about your approach. How do you plan your year ahead? What works for you and what would you recommend?

Is your life a journey of discovery through time?

Our lives are a set of moments connected through the string of time. Each moment brings an ocean of opportunity. You can react passively and let the moment float past without letting it affect you in any way. You might not be able to recall such a moment a few seconds later. You can also react in a more active manner to some moments and allow strong emotions of happiness, joy, euphoria, frustration, disappointment or sadness to emerge. It is in observing our reactions to each moment that we learn about ourselves. The things we value or care deeply about. The things that have no connection or affinity to us. Spotting the repeating patterns for these reactions provides invaluable clues that can help unlock meaning and create new paths for our life.

You might be thinking about how to observe your thinking when I have no time to do all daily tasks. We all seem to have taken so much responsibility that we have forgotten to leave time for ourselves. This lack of reflection time, mindfulness time or meditation time is increasing our stress levels and resulting in mental health problems or sickness. As we come to the end of the year it is a good time to create a little “me time” and ask yourself if you are making time to enjoy life as well as life.

Every moment of life is full of opportunities for learning, growing, being grateful or being happy. You will only understand this if you slow down a little rather than rushing through life. Commit to one task each day where you will try to slow down a little and try to be fully present. Include time for reflection to see what you can learn about yourself. Over the week see what patterns you can find. Try to do this with a friend or someone you trust. You will be amazed by what you discover and you will suddenly see aspects of your life that you didn’t realise were there.

I am keen to hear your views and what you have learned. Please do share comments here. Also, if you are interested in writing a future Sunday Sprinkle please do let me know.