How will you show your gratitude this festive season?

America’s celebrated Thanksgiving and showed their gratitude last week. Thanksgiving reminds us to be grateful for all that makes the harvest possible. It got me thinking about how we should show our gratitude during the festive season. We want to show our family and friends that we care about them and are thinking of them. We need to show our gratitude to the earth and be more sustainable. The evidence of the climate crisis is all around us. We need to play our part by being more sustainable.

In planning for the festive season let’s all be more creative and find sustainable ways to show we care about our loved ones. Here are a few suggestions for what I am planning this year:

1) Swap the card with a call – A large collection of cards around the fireplace may create a festive effect in your lounge, however, is this a sustainable approach? There are many more sustainable approaches to creating that festive vibe such as reusable decorations. Why not send an e-card instead. Better still swap the card for a call. The call will not only be appreciated it can help deepen the relationship.

2) Give gifts that people need, can read or share. Kate Bottely – co-host of the BBC Radio 2 Good Morning Sunday show, said as a family they will only buy gifts that are in one of the following categories – things people need, can read or share. These are ideal categories for gifts and I will be adopting these for future gifts.

3) Spend more quality time with those you love. Arranging a fun activity that will invole the whole family can create memories you will cherish for the future. I can remember playing Pictionary with my mother and father one Christmas using a tablet and stylus with the image displayed on the TV. This was magical! Such a simple game brought everyone together, we joked and laughed. It is these kinds of memories that makes life worthwhile.

How will you make this festive season a little more sustainable and special? Please share your ideas, so we can all learn from each other

How do you prepare for a new role?

I started a new adventure this week in the role of Group CEO – BCS (British Computer Society, Chartered Institute of IT Professionals). I had used the time since it was announced and now to understand what this adventure might entail. I kept the reminding myself there is a big difference between looking at a garment on a website, through a shop window, feeling it in the store and trying it on. Looking at the garment being worn by a model, along with the perfect surrounding will create an almost perfect impression. Looking at it through the window with the carefully positioned lighting the garment it may still look ideal however some false impressions might get corrected. When you pick up the garment you will feel the type of cloth, the quality of the workmanship and so on. You might still think this is the garment you should buy. Only when you put it on and look at yourself in the mirror will you be sure it is the right garment.

In a similar manner, when you start a new job, you will have formed an opinion about what you will need to do in the role. The first few weeks (at least 30 days) should be devoted to listening so as to understand the reality of your responsibility. Listen to those in your team, adjacent teams, superiors, those you hope to lead, customers, suppliers, partners and anyone you may come into contact with in the role. The wider you throw the net the more you will understand and you will be prepared for what is to come. Look for the weak signals of trouble ahead, also find the connections between the different signals you have heard. From this understanding, develop the hypotheses of what you need to do in the role. In the next phase define the outcomes you plan to achieve in a few weeks/months, the next year and into the future. This idea of now, next and future is helpful is structuring or prioritising your ideas. Again this typically takes 30 days. In the next 30 days you need to focus on delivering something substantial to gain trust of colleagues or those you work with/for. The first deliverable is critical as it establishes your reputation and must provide the foundation for what you plan to accomplish.

Whilst I can spend many blog posts talking about each of these stages, I think it is most important to remember that any change of role provides a fresh beginning. An opportunity to learn from the past and progress towards realising your own ambitions. I certainly looking forward to my next adventure and will be following this kind of 30/60/90 plan. How do you prepare for a new role? What is your first 90 day plan? What advise would you give someone like me starting a new adventure?

What makes a moment special?

Being on a boat in the India Ocean and seeing this turtle come right to the boat was tremendous. Being with my dear wife, daughter, son and daughter in law made this a special moment. It got me thinking about what makes a moment special. Firstly you need to be present, it would have been too easy to have been looking the other way or allow your attention to drift. Doing something for the first time can make something special. You can always add a little something to make a regular activity into fresh and special experience.

Experiencing something for the first time with those you love makes the moment more special. We had all see turtles in a zoo or aquarium. No one had seen such a large turtle in its natural habitat. A few minutes after I took this piciutre a baby from the family also swam past. The rest of the family are more confident swimmers and they had the opportunity to swim with the turtles. Earlier we had seen a family of dolphins coming up for air before swimming out onto the deep ocean. Another equally special moment for all that I am sure we will remember for a long time.

The comibination of being there, being together with loved ones and being grateful can turn mundane activities into special moments. We all need to remind ourselves to remove or minimise the distractions so that we can be present. That means really being there with them and not thinking about what you need to do in the future. Make time to be present with the ones we love. For those with a busy diary mark the time in the diary. Don’t forget to fill your heart with gratitude as this will allow the true happiness to emerge.

What makes a moment special for you? How you make time to create those special moments?

Are you getting that sinking feeling?

Walking along the beach at Hastings this week, we came across this fascinating sculpture of this sinking boat. It reminded me of moments of that sinking feeling, which I am sure you have all experienced. Everything you do seems to go wrong regardless of how carefully you plan. I can remember being caught taking a biscuit from the special biscuit tin. The biscuits had been specially prepared for guests so had been instructed told not to take them. All the following tasks seemed to go wrong in some way and everyone starts to say ” you are useless”. Naturally, this gets you down and you start to become reluctant to do anything. You feel the everyone is against you and there is nothing you can do.

This is a time when you must remember two things. Firstly, life is full of ups and downs so you need to be prepared for whatever comes your way. Secondly, when things don’t go as you expected you are being given a learning opportunity. You need to reflect on what you could and should do. You should have complied with the instructions you have been given or paid more attention when the instructions were given. Ups and downs make life more interesting. Repeating the same multiple times becomes monotonous and tedious. We crave new experiences and will try to push the boundaries as far as possible. We try to find innovations that improve or simplify any activity.

In essence, the sinking feeling is a reminder that the path to sweetness and happiness is waiting to emerge when we are ready for it. Also, this will feel sweeter as a change from a low to a high is much greater than a slight increase. Remember to search for the opportunity that is hidden and trust that success will come to those who are persistent.

Do you remember having such a sinking feeling? How did it feel when you came through this phase?

Does all happiness come from helping others?

Whilst no one would argue that the act of helping others results in many forms of happiness. The helper, the helped, those that watched the helping and those that heard the story about the help will all experience some happiness. However, the question here is does all happiness stem from some form of helping others. You might argue that there are moments of happiness that the result of selfishness. The desire to satisfy your needs without any regard for others and in many cases intentionally causing someone pain or suffering. As you dig deeper into these selfish acts, rarely have they been performed alone. When you look behind those seemingly selfish acts others helped and supported that selfish person to achieve their happiness. There is often a long list of people that fuelled the selfishness and provided encouragement.

The more I thought about the different moments of happiness, the more I could see the unsung heroes that helped create that happiness. Everyone can and should show their appreciation for all the help that is given to them. Sadly all too often we are too busy to even notice the people that have helped us. We all need to try harder to thank those that have helped us. We need to make a habit of thanking at least one person each day for helping us. This will most likely be unexpected and I suspect very much appreciated. Your thanks will I hope inspire the receiver to thank someone and so you will start a positive wave of happiness.

I struggled to think of anything where there wasn’t someone that helped create the happiness. Can anyone think anything?

Are you thinking about all those who have helped you in the past and played an active role in the happiness in your life today? Have you thanked them? If not why not thank them today and let’s create a wave of happiness…